About Him

On the 14th of March, 1988 at 0800 hours a child was born. His name was Kristian David Terry. He was born with severe retardation, abnormal growth and testosterone level, hitting puberty at 6, and at age 10 he shared a similar appearance to the late Freddy Mercury. He was taught Yugoslav as a primary language instead of the recommended ‘English’. This was a clever joke by his parents who were provided with countless laughs. From an early age Kristian was only fed meat and pasta in the hope that he would one day become a stereotypical ‘ethnic’. Through school his height made him an easy target for abuse with common remarks such as; ‘racist’, ‘anti-sematic’ and ‘necrophiliac’. His abnormal growth ability forced him to abandon his life long dream of becoming a miniature-horse jockey. He was divorced from his wife at age 11 and struggled to hold a steady relationship due to his abusive and bullying nature against women. The sandpit gave him the greatest joys, where he was at home building small torture traps for wounded children, yet simple school life in Williamstown Grammar would cease in 1999. He was moved to the notorious correction facility named Westbourne Grammar. Located in Truganina (aboriginal for ‘dump’) he made many enemies such as Science and Mathematics. He also made many friends, most of them against their will. He excelled at many sports such as boche, curling and rhythmic gymnastics none of which were recognised as elite sports because of their ‘homosexuality’. At age 18 he was released from WGS with an undeserved sense of achievement. He studied Design in which he discovered his first true love; Coffee. Now hoping to conquer the world creating video games which hold the power to world peace and are so beautiful it is said to make goats weep. Kristian’s only ability to draw with a fine-liner earned him widespread fame throughout his household, and has worked on numerous projects and has had many exhibitions. The latest one being in his ‘TV room’. His success has triggered the establishment of major corporations such as Nike, Pepsiand KDT Construction. His victory against such adversity can only be described as ‘a lie’. If you would like to contact Kristian he may be seen frequently around Yarraville and is willing to sign autographs or answer any enquiries regarding naming of objects, structures and gods in his name.

In memory of Kristian David Terry 1988 -present

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